Saturday, February 28, 2009

You Know, I'd Probably React In The Same Manner. . .




I think we should install this at Titus 1:9 for all the posts about the President of the U.S.A. and the posts about the Presiding Bishop. Wadda buncha whiners! Class warfare my butt! How come it wasn't class warfare when all the money was being directed towards the folks at the top of the pile? But I digress. . . .

This Morning at Parroquia San Cristóbal

This morning the Lovely Mona and I rose early to get to the church before 8:00 am. Today the Vacation Bible School bunch have their outing to Parque Omar. We had a short "devocional" before they boarded the bus. The Lovely Mona took photos of the smiling lil' terrors children and their teachers.

Tomorrow, en la Misa a las 10:30, they will have their closura, or graduation. I signed some 68 certificates yesterday, so I'm expecting a crowd. And, of course, many photos will be shot.

Random photos of this morning's gathering.


Waiting for things to start








Primos







Waiting for the bus










The Bus


Some Words from the Global Center: Comunicado de la Conferencia de las Iglesias Anglicanas de América Acerca de su Mutua Responsibilidad en la Misión

Bishop Murray called me last night upon his return from Costa Rica. He said the conference was wonderful. Five primates were present (but not the Presiding Bishop of the Southern Cone. However, two Bishops from the Southern Cone attended) and the discussions were fruitful. He asked that I post this communiqué.

Communiqué of the Conference of the Anglican Churches of the Americas in Mutual Responsibility and Mission
February 22-27, 2009
“AMAZING TOGETHER”

Delegations from the Provinces of the Anglican Church of Brazil, the Anglican Church of Canada, the Anglican Church of the Central Region of America (IARCA), the Episcopal Church, the Anglican Church of Mexico, the dioceses of Uruguay, Peru and Cuba met in San José, Costa Rica from February 22 to 27, 2009. Present with the clergy and laity at the conference were the Most Rev. Mauricio Andrade, the Most Rev. Martin Barahona, the Most Rev. Fred Hiltz, the Most Rev. Katharine Jefferts Schori and the Most Rev. Carlos Touche Porter.

For this historic conference, we invited all provinces in the Americas and the Caribbean to discuss our mutual responsibility in mission, to discover a sense of amazement in being together in the Body of Christ through prayer, reflection and return to action, to reaffirm the unity of the Church, to make communion real and tangible, and to reaffirm our need for each other. During these days together we rejoiced in the love of God.

We send greetings to the Archbishop of Canterbury, Dr. Rowan Williams, to all provinces of the Anglican Communion, Primates and Moderators, to all our sisters and brothers in Christ in the worldwide Anglican Communion. We are grateful that the primates of the provinces of the Southern Cone and the West Indies gave us their permission to invite their individual dioceses to meet with us.

Present at the conference as the keynote speaker was the Rev. John K. Kafwanka, Research and Project Officer for Mission and Evangelism in the Anglican Communion, who challenged all present to evangelize in effective and creative ways.

During our time together we shared the Eucharist, engaged in Bible study, presented the work in our provinces, dioceses and local churches, focusing on the Five Marks of Mission. We committed to support each other in advocating with the poor for a world that more closely reflects the Kingdom of God.

We also reflected on possibilities for future mission within the contexts of:

* the relationships and efforts toward unity fostered during the 2008 Lambeth Conference of Bishops,
* the need to act ecumenically,
* the political and economic realities in the world impacting our ability to live out our mission,
* the growing urbanization of the world,
* the desire to conserve and preserve our environment,
* the Communion´s role in promoting achievement of the Millennium Development Goals, and
* the emerging and growing role of Indigenous peoples in the Church.

We spoke about our hopes and dreams, and shared a vision of our future together as Churches in the Americas and Caribbean. We acknowledge that there are tensions within our beloved Anglican Communion, yet we know that there is much more that we have in common. Our unity begins with our baptism which makes us ministers of God´s grace in the world.

We share a world, but know that God´s mission has no borders. Our communities are challenged by the world´s economic crisis, the degradation of creation, the alienation of our youth, and the growing disparity between rich and poor. In the midst of these challenges, God calls us to proclaim in both word and deed the Good News of the Kingdom to all whom we encounter.

As we face this critical time in the Americas and the Caribbean, we are guided by the spiritual wisdom that comes from the stories and teachings of the first Christian missionaries in the Book of Acts that we studied during our time together. “But Peter said, ´I do not possess silver and gold, but what I do have I give to you: In the name of Jesus of Nazareth, stand up and walk.´” Acts 3:6. We are challenged by the message of Acts to proclaim that “another world is necessary and possible,” but also to act urgently to promote the fullness of life that God intends for each of us.

God has given each of our provinces many gifts, and calls us to share them with our brothers and sisters. We must all learn how to receive those gifts, as well as give them. God has made us all mutually responsible for His mission of reconciling the world and our interdependence in Christ makes this possible.

In the context of our dialogue, we call on the Anglican Consultative Council to accept a proposal it is due to consider during its meeting in Kingston, Jamaica in May 2009 to add a sixth Mark of Mission: peace, conflict transformation and reconciliation.

We thank all who made this conference possible, including the Design Team, Iglesia Anglicana de la Region Central de America, and our hosts in the Diocese of Costa Rica. We pledge to maintain and deepen the relationships we have made during our time here. We pledge to work together for God´s mission in this part of the world and we pray that we will meet again.

I see that Caminante scooped me on this! ¡Felicidades, hermana mía!

Friday, February 27, 2009

Friday Red Mr. Peanut Bank and Gallito Mescalito Blogging


Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. I am Crocagator, your dog-toy-in-the-house-reporter. Our question today is: What are you giving up for Lent? We gonna ask some of these dog toys and knick-knacks this probing kweshin.




Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Hello, big red thing. And who are you?
Red Mr. Peanut Bank Hello, I am Red Mr. Peanut Bank. How are you this fine evening?
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. I am fine. Gotta kweshin: What are you giving up for Lent?
Red Mr. Peanut Bank Well, as a plastic toy manufactured to hold coins, I'm not really called to repentance or penitence or fasting, but, as a plastic toy manufactured to hold coins living in the house of a priest, I must admit that the peer pressure is great, so I shall be giving up chocolate for Lent.
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Is that gonna be tuff for you? I mean, do you just luvs yer chocolate?
Red Mr. Peanut Bank Well, I've never actually HAD any chocolate; I'm a plastic toy manufactured to hold coins, so I can't really eat anything. But, I hear that giving up chocolate for Lent is The Thing To Do, so I shall do so. Also, I shall give up paying any attention to Joe the Plumber and his ilk.
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Okay, Thanks. Goodbye.
Red Mr. Peanut Bank No, no, no, thank YOU!




Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Hello, very colourful thing! And who are you?
Gallito Mescalito ¡Shriek!
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Okay. . . Well, noisy thing, I have a kweshin: What are you giving up for Lent?
Gallito Mescalito ¿Shrieky-shriek? ¡Shriek!
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Gots no idea what yer sayin'. Think I'll go.
Gallito Mescalito ¡¡¡SSSHHHRRRRRIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEKKK!!!




Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Hello, luverly blue thing! And who are you?
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Hey there. I am Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love. What's shakin', crocagator?
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Yes you are! Gotta kweshin: What are you giving up for Lent?
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Well, I've heard that some folk are giving up Pepsi in all its forms for Lent, while others are giving up hot sauce, but since I haven't killed anyone, I see no reason for that kind of severe penance. I will be giving up Show Tunes for Lent. Oh, and I won't pay attention to Joe the Plumber and his ilk.
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Yes indeedy. Well, thanks for answering our kewshin, and have a nice evening.
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love I know I will!




Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Hello, dirty orange thing. And who are you?
Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy I yam Mistah Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitteh Toy! Waddaya doin'?
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. That's quite a name! A bit long, doncha think? Can I call you "Dirty Orange Thing?"
Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy No, butcha kin call me "cat!"
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Cat. Gotta kweshin: What are you giving up for Lent?
Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy Well, Eyeve taut long n' hahd 'bout dis, an' I tinks dat maybee eye will give up all bliniss of haht, pride, vainglory, hypocrisy, envy, hatred, malice, an' all wanta chairuty. Oh, an' payin' any 'tenshun a Joe da Plummah and his ilk.
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Cat. Quite uh anser, quite uh anser! See ya!
Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy Not if I sees ya foist, pal! Oops, did I jus' break my fast? Dang!




Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Woah! Mooses!
Mighty Moose of Vermont May I help you?
Fuzzy Southern Mountain Moose Look! Iytsa crocagaytah!
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Mooses! Gotta kweshin: What are you giving up for Lent?
Fuzzy Southern Mountain Moose Ahm givin' up choc'lat, jes' lahk ure s'posed tah!
Mighty Moose of Vermont Great answer, lovey-dovey! I will be giving up smoking. Oh! And paying any attention whatsoever to that Joe the Plumber person and his ilk.
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Giving up smoking can be pretty extreme! I didn't know moose had any experience with tobacco.
Mighty Moose of Vermont Not tobacco, smoking fish. Well, actually, I can't smoke fish, either; can never keep the darn things lit!
Fuzzy Southern Mountain Moose Deah haht, wah wuz yoo talkin' 'bout eylk? We don' know any eylk!
Mighty Moose of Vermont Not elk, ILK! You know, "family, class, or kind." Heavens! I wouldn't have anything to do with elk, for goodness sake!
Fuzzy Southern Mountain Moose Thaynk Gawd! Ah wuz worraied!
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Think I'll be on my way!




Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Tiny Baby Jesus and a duck!
Lil' Jesus I'm Lil' Jesus, NOT "Tiny Baby Jesus!"
¡El Penguino! Y yo soy un penguino, ¡no soy "duck"!
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Sorry 'bout dat! Gotta kweshin: What are you giving up for Lent?
¡El Penguino! I'm giving up motor-boat races and sky diving. Oh yeah, and I'm giving up paying attention to Joe the Plumber and his ilk.
Lil' Jesus I'm giving up food and water for a period of forty days while in the wilderness. And, of course, since I will be in the wilderness, I, too, will be ignoring Joe the Plumber and his ilk.
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Tanks fer da ansers, lil guys!




Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Ugly ting, 'sup?
Grumpy the Gargoyle Go away!
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Wadda grump! Gotta kweshin: What are you giving up for Lent?
Grumpy the Gargoyle Nothing. Leave me alone!
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Some kinda heafin, eh? Come on, gotta give up sumpin'!
Grumpy the Gargoyle Okay, I've given up talking to a**h***s for Lent.
Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. Gonna git pretty lonely den, pal!
Grumpy the Gargoyle GO AWAY!!!




Crocagator Heh. Heh. Heh. So dere ya have it! No meat or alcohol for the denizens of Friday Red Mr. Peanut Bank and Gallito Mescalito Blogging for the next forty days! Gotta kweshin: What are YOU giving up for Lent? Tell me all about it in da comments!





¡¡¡SSHHHRRIIIIIIEEEEEEEKKK!!!

Friday Random Top Ten













Ya pushes "shuffle" and ya takes yer chances. . .

1. All I Left Behind Linda Ronstadt & Emilylou Harris
2. And She Was Talking Heads
3. Odorono The Who
4. Hanging On The Telephone The Nerves
5. Electricity Orchestral Manoeuvres In The Dark
6. The Loner Neil Young
7. Never Turn Your Back On Mother Earth Sparks
8. Deep Dark Truthful Mirror Elvis Costello
9. Oo-Wee Baby Doris Day
10. Ten Feet Tall XTX

Gee, we have a video for every song; that's a first! Well, the video for #6 isn't of Neil Young, 'cuz all they have on the Yootoobes are covers, but I chose the cover version by Supergrass, in which the music is note perfect! And I'll warn ya, the video for #3 is kinda creepy. #4 is a live, record store performance by two former members of The Nerves, including the guy who actually wrote the song. I've always liked the Nerves' version better than Blondie's, although Blondie's is good, too. It's just a great song! I dedicate #5 to Tengrain, Fran, and PJ, who luvs dem dat '80s stuff. Oh yeah, be sure to listen to that Big Fat Glam Guitar solo on #7!

So, wadda you listening to? Please post your lists in the comments.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

My Wayward Youth

Back in the mid-80's I helped start a Musician's Collective named First Strike. There were about 13 bands in the organization, and we all played at The Laundry Works until it became a gay piano bar; for some reason the new owners didn't want loud "alternative" bands playing there, so we ended up searching for another place, but never had another scene like The Laundry Works. So, can you find me in the photo? I know the Lovely Mona and Matty Boy probably can do so.

Thanks to Karl Thomas, formerly of Never Say Never for the photo!

For Grandmére Mimi


Nicked from Medium Large
Click on cartoon for larger version

Ash Wednesday


This is my Ash Wednesday sermon (for the morning service)

Today the city is quiet. All those who have spent the past few days dancing and drinking and carrying on are probably still asleep; while we, the faithful, have come together to begin the Holy Season of Lent. We have come together to hear God’s Word proclaimed, we have come to ask God for forgiveness of our sins, we have come to have ashes put on our foreheads as a sign of our penitence.

We now enter a season of penitence and fasting. Fasting is a means of concentration one’s mind on prayer. Fasting is not required, it should be a discipline that one decides to accept,not something imposed. Muslims have an entire month of fasting, and they don’t simply give up chocolate for that month; they are not allowed to eat from sunrise to sunset. They go throughout the daylight hours without any food and drinking only water. However, they make up for it every evening when the sun sets and they have a feast every night! Our tradition is to “give something up” for Lent, to fast in that manner. However, if one doesn’t feel called to fasting, I think that one can also take on a spiritual discipline. We have the opportunity to walk the Way of the Cross every Friday evening; I know some people who read theological or devotional literature during Lent; perhaps you may want to say the Rosary or the Prayer of the Heart, the Jesus prayer during this season. Perhaps you may want to put alms aside or help the less fortunate during the next forty days. There are many options to help us set this Holy Season apart.But one of the most important aspects of Lent is the call to repentance. Now, I believe that God calls us to repentance every day, but it is during the season of Lent that we are called to make public repentance. That is what penitence is all about: we are performing public acts of repentance. That is what our fasting, almsgiving, and prayer represent, they are signs that we have repented.

Our reading from the prophet Joel is about repentance and the need to return to the Lord. Joel was talking during a time of severe shortage due to a plague of locusts. Huge swarms of locusts had descended upon Israel and ate everything; the crops and every leaf and plant in their path, leaving nothing. Joel saw this plague as punishment from God and he called everyone to repent. The word used in the Hebrew text is "shubh" which means "turn," to turn to the Lord. In this context, "turn" is translated as a complete conversion of the heart, not just the outpouring of remorse for one’s wrongdoing.The Lord spoke through Joel and told the people of Israel to return to God, with weeping and fasting and mourning. They were to call everyone together, young and old, and were to make offerings to the Lord. The priests were to stand between the vestibule and the altar, and they were to weep and say, "Spare your people, oh Lord!" The priests of Israel were intermediaries between the people and God, so they had to ask God to spare them. Since Jesus came and died for our sins, we no longer need a priest to intervene; Jesus is the one who intervenes for us now. Christian priests are people selected to perform certain tasks within the community, tasks for which we have certain gifts, but we don’t speak to God on your behalf. Another sign of repentance in ancient Israel was to tear one’s clothing and to sit in a pile of ashes or to pile ashes on one’s head. In remembrance of that ancient practice, I will be putting some ashes on your forehead today.

I’ve been thinking about repentance, and I’ve been thinking about why we need to repent. We aren’t bad people; no one here is stealing or killing or committing what we all may consider The Big Sins, but we all have sin in our lives, we all fall short of the mark. There are those sins we commit on a personal level, you know, being selfish, ignoring the needs of others, saying cruel things to those around us, and other stuff that we all do but don’t want to admit to. I have been thinking also about the sins we commit as a Church. Even though we Christians are called to live in a certain way, we all fall short of the mark and we as a Church can fall short of the mark. At one time the Church, (and by Church I don’t mean or parish, I mean the Church Universal, Christians throughout the ages), condoned the buying and selling of human beings,the Church supported slavery and even used the Bible to justify such activity. A few years ago the Primados of the Anglican Communion participated in a Holy Eucharist held in a church in Zanzibar in which the altar is built over the place where slaves were sold. The Eucharist was held in honor of the last slave sold on that spot,and the end of slavery one hundred years ago. The Church has repented for participating in this terrible activity,an activity that they believed God condoned until one hundred years ago.

Over the centuries the Church has advocated mistreatment of women, it has advocated the persecution of Jews and those who are not Christians, and there were those who used the scriptures to support such views and the Church has had to repent of those evils. Right now there are those in the Church who want to ostracise and exclude people because of their sexuality, and they are able to find support of this exclusion in the scriptures. I believe that we, the Church, will eventually repent of this attitude, too. We all need to repent of the way we treat others,we as humans and as the Church need to repent for the way we have treated this planetand how we have polluted it and how the Developed World has exploited the earth’s resources to enrich their societies to the exclusion, oppression, and poverty of the Two Thirds World.The Church must repent of any support it has given to the government of the United States and its war in Iraq.

Repentance is more that wearing ashes on our foreheads, repentance is more than saying, “I’m sorry,” repentance is more than fasting and praying and giving alms. Repentance is a change of mind and heart it is the decision to follow God’s way instead of our own way. It requires discernment; we need to discern what is God’s way and what is society’s way. When we decide to follow God’s way instead of our own way, we will follow the Ten Commandments which we so often ignore. But when Jesus was asked what the most important commandment was, he said we are to love the Lord our God with all our heart, with all our soul, with all our mind and with all our strength and to love our neighbor as our selves. It seems to me that if we as people and as a Church truly repent, if we truly follow God’s way instead of our own, if we do love the Lord with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength and love our neighbors as ourselves, we won’t have the problems we have today, the Church will not be dividing along lines of sexuality and different understandings of authority, because we would be doing what God calls us to do, we would not be concentrating on things which divide us but we would be working for those things which unite us.

Practicing fasting, alms giving, and prayer are important aspects of Lent, and these practices can deepen our spiritual lives and strengthen our connection with the Lord, but what is most important is our intention in doing these things. Are we doing this to show how holy and righteous and wonderful we are, are we doing this to show we are so much better than those people who aren’t wearing ashes, or are we doing this as a sign of true repentance? Are we practicing prayer, fasting and almsgiving as a means of showing the world that we are pious, or are we doing this in order to strengthen our relationship with God? God knows our hearts, God knows what is going on in our lives. We may fool our neighbors but we can't fool God.If our Lenten practices are a means of bringing attention to ourselves, then we will already have our reward. But if we do this as a means of coming closer to God, as a means of increasing our own spiritual life and that of this parish, if these acts reflect true repentance on our parts, we will then be experiencing a true and holy Lent.

May our intentions and motives this Lent be pure. May we use this time as a means of spiritual preparation. May we use this time to grow in our love of God and each other. May we all keep a holy Lent.
Amen

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Monday, February 23, 2009

Carnaval Top Ten

Lord Cobra with some Weirdo

Carnaval Top Ten

1. Rocombey Lord Corba & Pan-Afro Sounds
2. Rum Lord Kitty
3. Ahora Quieres Vovler sami Y Sandra Sandoval
4. El Mensaje Los Fabulosos Festivals
5. Panama Esta Bueno Y . . . Ma Los Exagerado
6. Carta A Un Amigo Las Plumas Negras
7. Cumbia De Los Muertos Ozomatli
8. Soy Solo Para Ti Victor Boa y su Musica
9. Mi Reina Bonita Manuel de Jesús
10. Fire In San Miguelito Los Goom Boys

So, that Genius thing with which Our David is so enamoured? Well, it doesn't seem to recognize any of my calypsos or típico or any Carnaval music, so I chose these songs. Of course, only two of them appear on the YooToobes, so that complicates things, too! But I like all these songs, so there!

Rocombey has this great lyric:
One night I took a chance
And I went to a Voodoo dance
I was looking for new romance
That's why I went to the Voodoo dance

The High Priest looked very mean
When he appear upon the scene
He made a motion to me
And then begun the ceremony

What he said was:
"Recombey recombey selma,
Rocolo coloco con te
Recombey recombey selma,
Ashia aromey selma
Recombey recombey selma,
Rekula, kula de selma
Recombey recombey selma"

Well, I'm not too sure about that chorus, and some calypso expert is sure to appear and correct me, but such is life!

Here's a couple verses from Lord Kitty's calypso about female alcoholism:

Never see a woman drink so much rum
She washin' and she cookin' and she fallin' down!
Never see a woman drink so much rum
She washin' and she cookin' and she fallin' down!

When I tole the girl no drink no more
That is the part that make her get sore
She said "If you want me an' you be frien'
It be bettah nevah tell me dat again"

Never see a woman drink so much rum
She washin' and she cookin' and she fallin' down!
Never see a woman drink so much rum
She washin' and she cookin' and she fallin' down!

When I tole the girl she much change her life
Maybe some will make her him wife
She said "Instead of talking like a jackass
Bettah you give fifty cents to buy a small glass!"

I saw Lord Sugar sing this last year at the dinner in which we honored my favorite drummer, Ricky Staple. It sounds like a fun song until you pay attention to all the verses, then it's the story of one sad situation!

Lunes de Carnaval

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Domingo de Carnaval


Bla bla bla Sami y Sandra Sandoval This was THE Carnaval song last year. As you can see, Sandra was pregnant, but she certainly didn't let that slow her down much!

Saturday, February 21, 2009

¡CARNAVAL!


Dude! That is SO harsh! Yer bride left you at the altar to become Reina de Carnaval!

Last Night at Parroquia San Cristóbal

Yesterday we celebrated the 71st anniversary of the Episcopal Church Women of St. Christopher's Parish with Evensong. It was a pleasant service, and Lic. Patricia Young's talk on the importance of evangelism and a plan for evangelism was excellent. Mavis Evans led the Roll Call. This is something I enjoy: A roll of the various churches is called, beginning with the Episcopal churches and including the local Methodist, Baptist, and Seventh Day Adventist churches, and when a church is called, its representatives stand up and either quote a verse from the Bible or sing a song. Of course, everyone joins in on the song, so its a lot of fun! After Evensong we adjourned to the patio for a brindis (this IS St. Christopher's!). We had tiny empanadas, grapes, and a piece of yellow cake, along with some kind of sweet chicha which I don't drink as I am avoiding refined sugar (yeah, just empanadas and grapes for me).

This morning we had a celebration for Marie Clark's 70th birthday. The Rev. Canon Dennis Josiah, la Muy Reverenda Maize Lennan, Reverend Nelson Edwards and yours truly participated in a Eucharist giving thanks for Marie and her contributions to the Episcopal Church of Panamá. I didn't take any photos 'cuz I was busy with priesty stuff.

Carnaval has started, and I figure we won't get much sleep for the next few days as the neighbors party all night and the neighborhood boys blow off firecrackers constantly until early Wednesday morning. Panamanian parties last until 6:00a.m. or so, and during Carnaval they take place every night! And, as far as I can tell, no pancakes are consumed on Tuesday or any other evening. I like to watch the broadcast from Samba Stadium in Rio de Janero every evening with all the Brasilian Carnaval stuff.

Pancakes, heh!

Oh, photos from last night:

Lic. Patricia Young exhorts the faithful



Mrs. Cora Gill, head of the UTO for the Diocese of Panamá, presents Patricia with a corsage



Las Damas Episcopales de Parroquia San Cristóbal

Friday, February 20, 2009

Humorous Commentary


Nicked, as usual, from www.bartcop.com

Friday Red Mr. Peanut Bank and Gallito Mescalito Blogging Classic Edition

Hey kids, Padre Mickey here. I will be at Evensong this evening to celebrate the 71st anniversary of the ECW of St. Christopher's, so I won't be home in time to pose toys about the house and come up with a story. I invite you to enjoy this Classic Episode of Red Mr. Peanut Bank and Gallito Mescalito Blogging from February of last year.



Red Mr. Peanut Bank Hello, Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love! How are you this beautiful Friday evening?
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Oh, hi, Red Mr. Peanut Bank. Well, I'm in a bit of a funk!
Red Mr. Peanut Bank For heaven's sake. Why?
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Well, I've been mad all week about last week's Red Mr. Peanut Bank and Gallito Mescalito Blogging. There were way too many hippo jokes!
Red Mr. Peanut Bank Well, we weren't laughing AT you, but WITH you! There were several knock-knock jokes, too.
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Yeah, right. ¡PORfaVOR!



Gallito Mescalito ¡Shriek! ¿Shrieky-shriek?
Red Mr. Peanut Bank Hello, Gallito Mescalito! Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love was telling me that she didn't appreciate last week's jokes.
Gallito Mescalito ¿Shriek? Shriek-shriek-shrieky-shriek.
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Yeah? Well, they weren't telling rooster jokes!
Gallito Mescalito ¡Shriieeeekkkk!
Red Mr. Peanut Bank He's right, you know. Most jokes about roosters are filthy!
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Well, I can't argue with that.


Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy Oooo! Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love! How ah you dis beaootiful evenin'?
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Oh, it's the cat! Hey, what is the name of the unauthorized autobiography of the cat?
Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy Uh, I don' know. What?
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Hiss and Tell! What does a cat do when it gets mad?
Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy What the. . .?
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love IT HAS A HISSY FIT!



Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy Wot da heck is dis alla 'bout?
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love What happened when the cat went to the flea circus? He stole the whole show!
Red Mr. Peanut Bank She's angry because last week people told hippo jokes.
Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy I wasn't even heah las' week!
Red Mr. Peanut Bank I know. She's just lashing out.
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love What do you get when you cross an elephant with a cat? A big furry creature that purrs while it sits on your lap and squashes you!


Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy Dat does it. I'm outta heah!!
Red Mr. Peanut Bank I think I'll go with you.
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love What do you call a cat that has swallowed a duck? A DUCK FILLED FATTY PUSS!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy Sheesh!


Mighty Moose of Vermont Good evening, Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love!
¡El Penguino! ¡Buenas noches, señorita!
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Well, if it isn't the moose and penguin! Hey moose, What do you call a sleeping male moose?
Mighty Moose of Vermont A sleeping moose?
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love A bull-dozer!
¡El Penguino! ¡Ja!
Mighty Moose of Vermont That was dumb.
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Oh yeah? Well, who makes up Alaskan nursery rhymes?
Mighty Moose of Vermont I don't know; I'm from Vermont.
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Mother Moose! Hey! Who is the "Father of the North Country"?
¡El Penguino! ¡PORfaVOR!
Mighty Moose of Vermont I don't know and I don't care!
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love George Moosington!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!



¡El Penguino! Hey, where ya goin', moose?
Mighty Moose of Vermont I don't need this!
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Why do moose have such big antlers?
For better radio reception. THEY'RE MOOSIC LOVERS! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Mighty Moose of Vermont Bye!!!



¡El Penguino! Well, that was totally unnecessary! Why'd ya do that?
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Ooo, the penguin is still here. You must be soooo brave! Hey, penguin, What´s black and white and goes round and around?
¡El Penguino! Er, no se. What?
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love A Penguin in a revolving door! Why don´t you see Penguins in Britain?
¡El Penguino! ¡PORfaVOR!
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Because they´re afraid of Wales! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!



¡El Penguino! Okay, What do you call an insincere hippo?
A hippocrite.
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Heard it last week. And it's not funny!
¡El Penguino! Well, then. I'm outta here!
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Good riddance! See, these two penguins walked into a bar, which was really stupid,
cause the second one should have seen it. HAHAHAHAHA!
¡El Penguino! ¡Ciao!


Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Oh, hello, Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love! How are you tonight?
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love YOU!!! Hey, how is a rabbit like a Q-tip?
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House I don't know. How?
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love They both have cotton tails.
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Heh heh. Cute. Say, how do hippos commute?
In a hippopotabus.



Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Why is a leaky faucet like a cowardly bunny? Because it runs.
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House What did the hippo get when he started exercising every day?
Hippopotamuscles.
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love How is a rabbit like a cornstalk?
They both have big ears.
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House What do hippos put on their hot dogs?
Hippopotamustard.





Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love What are four hundred rabbits hopping backwards? A receding hare line.
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House What jungle animal can you put in a trance?
A hypnopotamus.




Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love Why is a rabbit like a cent? Because it has a head on one end and a tail on the other.
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House What do you call an insincere hippo?
A hippocrite. (Yeah, I know, but there's a limited amount of hippo jokes; there's bound to be some repetition)


FOUR HOURS LATER
Red Mr. Peanut Bank Good grief! Are they still at it?
Mr. Chompy's Chewed-up Squeaky Kitty Toy Yeah. De may still be at it next week!
¡El Penguino! ¡PORfaVOR!
Mighty Moose of Vermont How sad!
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House What did the hippo get when he stopped shaving? A hippopotamustache.
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love What did the rabbit say to the carrot? Its been nice gnawing you.
Bunrab, the Filthiest Toy in the House Where should you bury a dead hippo? In a hippocrypt.
Miss Egyptian Hippo of Love What is the difference between a crazy rabbit and a counterfeit cent? One is a mad bunny and the other is bad money.
Gallito Mescalito ¡¡¡SSSHHHRRRRIIIIIIEEEEEEEKKK!!!

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